It has however been a great week…..and here’s why….

I had a lot of things going on – work, home, family, friends – the usual stuff – nothing that everyone else doesn’t have to cope with…then the children got ill, then I got ill and then everything stopped.

The first thing that went was the work. I couldn’t post orders, reply to e-mails or do any of the long and meandering To Do list that I have proudly spent the last six years building up and have no intention completing or what-on-earth-would-I-do-with-myself? (The important thing is not to complete tasks efficiently, but to keep adding them in at the bottom so you appear useful to yourself).

I missed two social engagements and immediately panicked that I would never be asked anywhere again – its worse than calling in sick at work – is she really ill or just bored of our company…? I never liked her anyway….who else can we ask…?

I then missed two 40th birthdays – I forgot to check to send cards. This year almost everyone in England is turning 40 and now I have forgotten to tell two of them that they are old and congratulations for it. I think they may be secretly happier for receiving one less smug card but who knows. I shall probably be excommunicated.

Rapidly on the heels of that went the cooking, shopping and general going out-ness. The pyjamas stayed on, the drugs came out and a surprising number of blankets appeared in the front room for us to crawl under. Luckily it was only colds – so we were able to self medicate and after six years in the game (*in*), I did not panic and take everyone to casualty as soon as the first temperature crept above 41degrees. Firstly because I know that I am rubbish at taking temperatures and the last time I reported myself to the doctor with a suspected temperature of 43 it turned out to be 38 and I immediately felt well on hearing the numbers (sometimes I wonder if he was lying, but hey ho – it worked!).

The other reason we do not fly off to put ourselves in the hands of the medical professionals is that the last two times we have done so, I swear they have been responsible for making my children more ill. In the nicest possible way…..

The triage system in play in our local hospital meant that Seren was woken up to be examined by no less than five different people from the admissions nurse to the head of paediatrics on our last four hour trip to casualty. Now I didn’t go to medical school but I know that being woken up five times in four hours (in the middle of the night) and being asked the same question by strangers while they shine lights in your eyes and try to get you to wee in a cup is NOT going to make things better in the world of a sickly three year old. So in the end I thanked them kindly for their  input and took her home none the wiser. She slept for 13hours and was right as rain. The second time we braved casualty she had opened up her face falling over and as long as I live I will never forget the Irish doctor sticking her little finger IN TO the hole in her forehead and saying “Sure – she seems pretty hardy!”…She is extremely hardy and now she has a hole in her forehead where your finger has been. No stitches or pain relief and a year on, you can still see where the finger went in and she flinches if you touch it…..I’m going to stick with voodoo and positive thinking next time anything serious happens.

Once we got comfy under the blankies everything slowed down. No-one was properly hungry so we had toast and honey and lots of it. We watched back to back films and in between the cold sweats, hacking coughs and large volumes of phlegm, it was properly lovely. It must be the first normal week-day in 6 years that I haven’t worried about getting to the post office  before 5.30pm to get the orders shipped because I was being cuddled simultaneously by two hot little miseries….

And then it occurred to me – we should get ill more often! Not really. That would be stupid.

But I loved these days with my children, we had cuddles, we relaxed and for all the wrong reasons, I loved that they needed me.

If I’m honest, apart from the need to earn money, and to keep busy, I spend alot of this time building up my business and making myself as valuable as I can to other people so that it won’t hurt so much when the children decide they can manage on their own. I know they are only 6 and 3 and nothing stops me from being there for them now – that was the whole point of giving up the big job and doing things from home and to suit family life BUT they are only on loan to me and one day, someone else will be bringing them honey on toast (if they are lucky and can afford a butler), and I might not even get to hear they have been ill.

One sad day, I’ll get a cold and find myself under the blankie all alone and weeping into my tissues whilst watching “Mr Poppers Penguins”  (it’s truly awful – I shall be crying for so many reasons)….Its not often you find yourself hoping a cold will hang around for just a little bit longer…

I, by way of comparison, walked around in the wrong sized bra for twenty years before I finally got fitted and discovered a whole new way of thinking about my underwear. During that time, I left uni, lost, gained and lost about ten stone altogether, had two babies and managed to reach 40. And yet still I thought I had the breasts of my 18year old self.

I wasn’t aware I was wearing the wrong size because I didn’t know what I was missing. It wasn’t until I was measured and fitted properly that I realised what a good bra feels like. My shape changed instantly, my clothes looked better, I was more upright and comfortable…Breathing? I was doing it! And despite spending years believing I had small breasts and a broad back, I discovered I actually had large-ish breasts and a narrow back (at least at the part the bra is supposed to fit on). It was a revelation.

Now, I’m not advocating spending a fortune on underwear in these troubled times, but my advice to every woman reading this would be to make sure you are the proud owner of at least one (and hopefully two, so that you can wash the first one occasionally) decent fitting bras. If your bra fits properly you will avoid back pain, posture issues, possible cysts, breathing problems, stretched breast ligaments and a whole host of medically un-proven but anecdotally correct self-esteem issues. You also need to bear in mind that all bras fit differently – even those from the same manufacturer in different styles can be a cup size or a band space out, so it really is no use buying the same size bra in different styles. If you go for a fitting in a well known high street chain and the fitter brings you five bras of different styles in the same size to try, run away before she can do any more harm. There is no way all of those bras are going to fit you  correctly, and there is a good chance none of them will.

Here are a few pointers to see if the one you have on right now is the one for you:

• It should fit on the narrowest part of your back – on some women this may mean it is almost as low as the waist but this is where it should be to provide maximum support and to ensure the cups sit firmly at the root of each breast
• It should move with you – not independently of you! If you raise your arms and it comes up too then it is too loose. By the same token, if you had Mr Tickle arms and could reach all the way round to the back, you should only be able to pull it away from your frame by about 1cm.
• You should not be aware of it. You should not need to adjust it during the day and you should not need to fiddle with it.
• The straps should be doing their job so well that there is no adverse downward pressure on your shoulders. By the same token, they should not be slipping about.
• The side seams should be flat and in line with your armpits. Not baggy, not pulled and certainly not spreading outwards.
• There should be no bulging breast tissue at the tops of the cups and no wrinkling in the middle either.

These are just a few of the ways you can tell if the bra you are wearing is doing its job. If it isn’t, make the next one earn its keep by being properly fitted by a trained professional. The bralady network is a good place to start.

These lovely women have all shared horrendous bra fitting experiences in the past and have been trained to help people in similar positions. They will come out to you to ensure you are fitted properly. I know this because after my revelatory fitting experience I decided to become one myself. (It’s a bit like Victor Kyam but without the actual purchase of any multi-million pound businesses).

Ladies, we owe it to our breasts to treat them well, and we owe it to our clothes to give them the best possible chance to look amazing. If you haven’t been fitted for a bra since you were 18, or indeed ever, then look up the bra ladies – I guarantee you will be pleasantly surprised.

Putting aside the idea of allowing alcohol to fuel all of my planning, I think there is room for some resolutions this year. We have had a very tough year and next year’s business plans are very structured and uncompromising. But the thing about being a mumpreneur is that at the heart of the business there is a mummy, and she may not always feel like responding to a structured and powerful business plan when life throws the other stuff at her….

I am going to use my New Year’s Resolutions to cushion the business plan with thoughts, feelings and reminders that will help me when the going gets tough next year…. In the absence of something more rigid to guide me, I think a resolution or two could help…:

1)      Look after my health

Recently I managed to make time for some serious regular exercise – after saying all year long I needed to do it, I finally committed over November and December. It has been wonderful. I am energised, happier, more relaxed and far more efficient. Next year, when my motivation wanes and other things start to eat away at my time, I will read this paragraph and remind myself why for me, a crucial aspect of functioning well, is making time to exercise.

2)      Look after my family

My new year’s resolution for my family is going to revolve around food….Instead of grabbing something from the freezer, sticking it in the oven and rushing the children through it so I can get back to work while they watch telly, I am going to cook at least one meal from scratch and eat it slowly with them. Every single day. Without the radio on and with the phone switched off….Better dust off that Annabel Karmel book….

3)      Look after My Parents

I have spent all year resisting the fact that both of my parents need a good degree of support. It has felt inconvenient and restrictive and to be brutally honest I have felt resentful that they need this level of help when my children are both still so young and I am trying to keep my business going. Then I waste time feeling guilty for not being more understanding. Someone much wiser than me once said “Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”. I need to get on with the business of accepting this situation for what it is. If I can’t help them with good grace and patience, then I shouldn’t be trying to do it at all.

4)      Accept My Family as it is

I spent a lot of 2011 wishing for another baby. It’s not that I can’t have one, but my husband sees our family as complete. I also get extremely ill when I’m pregnant (hospital features heavily, as does a lot of lying down, some crying and a GREAT deal of vomit). He would have to look after me, my parents, my children and the dog for months, whilst holding down his job and pretending to be pleased that I am bringing another little person in to the world against his better judgement. I have wasted a lot of time being sad, angry, resentful and ashamed at myself for all of the above feelings and we are no further forward. It seems to me, I can allow the sadness to pervade my otherwise happy life, or I can choose to get on with enjoying what I DO have. Guess which one I am going to try for in 2012.

5)      Lighten Up

Some days, this year, it has felt as though I have to remember to be happy. I now realise that with exercise, good food, the odd reminder of the brighter side and a gentle-telling-off-of-myself when I start to wallow, that happiness does not become a conscious decision. It just happens. The business has been very challenging this year and for a while I forgot why I was doing it. I also forgot to enjoy it. I want 2012 to be the year that we remember when laughing our heads off was the norm and being stressed or angry was unusual. I plan to maintain that mindfulness and accept control of it. Wish me luck – this could be the best year of our lives if I let it …..

Happy New Year! If you’re expecting a baby this year, then you already know it’s going to be a great one – but let us help you really start it with a bang with a few tips on shopping the sales to rock your growing bump!

January means sales – so what better time to stock up on some gorgeous maternity wear?  Remember, choose key pieces that you can dress up in different ways – and maternity styles that double up as breast feeding pieces are even better value for money!  Our Anna Jane Nursing & Maternity dress is a perfect example (http://www.mummylooksfab.co.uk/Anna-Jane-Nursing-and-Maternity-Dress) – it’s simple, but chic – will see you right through pregnancy and breast feeding, and is currently reduced to just £35!  It’s a great little dress that you can adapt for work or play, or even dress up with some statement jewellery for a night on the town – grab one quick!

Our Laeticia Nursing Dress is another complete bargain – currently half price at just £25 (http://www.mummylooksfab.co.uk/Laeticia-Nursing-Dress).  The fitted yet stretchy style will hug your bump beautifully, and once your little one is here, it provides  easy, discreet feeding access, while still making you feel like a super glam yummy mummy!  Choose from classic black, or bang-on trend plum (Or while it’s half price – why not treat yourself to both?!)

The sales are also a great time to pick up a great pair of maternity jeans – choose a style that will grow with you, which you can also wear after the birth while you’re working your way back into your pre-baby skinnies!  A well fitting pair of jeans is the staple of many a bump-rocking outfit, so shop around to make sure you get a pair you love.

And while you’re browsing, remember to look out for other bargains you’ll need soon too – a great changing bag, a gorgeous nightgown for in hospital, and of course tiny little sleep suits for that little person you’re busy making!

Having a baby is an expensive business – so grab yourself a cuppa & milk those sales for all they’re worth!

Just grab yourself a simple, yet chic frock, and then accessorise it like a pro with our top tips.

The little black dress is a classic wardrobe must have, and this one: http://www.mummylooksfab.co.uk/Nursing-and-Maternity-Wrap-Dress will support you all through pregnancy and beyond, is super flattering, and simple to dress up whatever look you fancy.

For a rock chick look, team with black tights or leggings, your favourite black boots, a stack of metallic bangles and some big hoop earrings.  Scoop your hair up into a high ponytail; paint your nails a foxy bright red & you’re ready to rock!

For a more laid back look, team with leggings & a pair of ballet pumps, add a chunky beaded necklace, swipe on some lip gloss and enjoy looking effortlessly gorgeous!

If you fancy a touch of Hollywood glamour, wear your frock with nude tights and the highest heels you can stand. (If you can’t bear the thought of even a small heel, treat yourself to a sparkly pair of pumps – there are loads of great ones on the high street right now.)  Accessorise with plenty of bling – the shops are generally full of pretty diamante treats this time of year – they sparkle like the real thing for a fraction of the cost! A statement necklace will break up the neckline, and a few glittering bangles will look great too.  Either set your hair in rollers for a real starlet look, or pile it up into an elegant chignon/messy bun if you’re short on time.  Grab some red lippie for a Marilyn-esque pout and get ready to sparkle!

Whatever you’re up to this festive season – have fun!

Its always held in a church around the corner from school and starts at the mind-bogglingly inconvenient time of 9.30am. I say this for PURELY selfish reasons because I understand completely that it can’t be in the evenings as the little ones would fall asleep and it can’t be any earlier as the vicar would, but 9.30am is slap bang in the middle of my daughters morning nursery session, so we go to the carol service, I drop her back at school and then about thirty seconds later I go and pick her up having blown another morning of work.

I appreciate it is voluntary and no-one is forcing me to attend. I could stay at home and power through my To Do list safe in the knowledge that she and her slightly bigger brother are singing up a storm without my teary eyes looking on. But I go, every year, and I cry a little bit at the loveliness of it all, get cold feet in the old church, feel guilty for not spending more time there and then sing “O Come All Ye Faithful” at the top of my voice and feel much better about life in general.

This year, my daughter decided she didn’t need to learn the words to the songs. After the thirtieth session of singing Little Donkey in the car, by myself, while she glowered out of the window and mumbled about my singing scaring the little donkey, I figured it would be better for all of us if I let it go. Who needs to know the words to the carols anyway? Its once a year and the made-up versions are far funnier. The hooting that goes on around the dinner table after one verse of “We three kings in Leicester Square”…that’s comedy gold for a 3 year old. Especially after the 6 year old has explained that they aren’t actually the words at all! Imagine!

However, my plan of nonchalance backfired horribly when she decided not to remain silent and po-faced as per our practices, but to ad-lib her way out of trouble….The three year old logic kicked in and she decided, “We’re in church….the Baby Jesus gets a lot of mentions….I figure that’s safe ground….I know, I’ll shout “Jesus!” in  time with the music and stamp my feet to draw extra attention to myself!! This plan cannot fail!”

I was too far away and to be honest, too lost in the carol to realise at first that the ungodly shouting was coming from my daughter and she appeared to be cursing someone in loud and ringing tones. I was reminded of every DIY session “Jesus! James! That’s my finger!”, every time the dog has accidentally bitten me “Jesus! Flapjack! That’s my bum!” and every time one of the children has thrown water on the laptop for no apparent reason “JESUS! You two!! That’s it – I’m off to the Travelodge!!”

I should be grateful that she didn’t elaborate and stuck to the simple but arresting lyric of “Jesus!”, and when the vicar finally intervened (I was too far away to politely rugby tackle her to the ground and cover her head with something woolly), she seemed very pleased with herself  that her own lyrics had garnered such attention from all the important people in the room – the vicar, the headmaster and the baby Jesus himself.

Next year we are going to start practising the words in August, and if it looks at all dodgy on the lyrics front, I will be working at  home that morning and singing “While Shepherds Washed Their Socks By Night” to my computer….Just to be safe, Seren will be tied up in the under-stairs cupboard until it is all over.

But, with a little careful planning, it can also be a lot of fun. Here are my own tips for how to rock your bump & embrace maternity fashion.

1. When you start to get bumpy, go through your wardrobe, bag up everything that doesn’t fit & put it somewhere safe. You won’t be wearing it for a while, and gazing lovingly at all your bump-unfriendly beauties as you’re expanding is just depressing! And be realistic – just because you can technically get into something, doesn’t mean it looks good – and keep in mind – you’re only going to get bigger!

2. As a rule, stuff worth keeping out for the duration includes: tunic tops, anything floaty & loose fitting, jersey dresses (they will hitch up at the front as your bump grows, but leggings are your friend – put a pair on underneath & pretty dresses become long bump-flattering tops.), longer length vest tops, anything elasticated.

3. Get yourself a bump band or two. Or three. I LOVE them. Basically, it’s like a boob tube for your belly, and wearing one means you can continue wearing non-maternity tops, letting the bump band fill the gap between the bottom of your top & the top of your bottoms (They’re also really handy after the event – great for covering up the mummy tummy during breast feeding, and for a little extra support & confidence while you’re getting back in shape.)

4. When buying new stuff, be selective. Make a list of what you really need. A decent pair of jeans or two, some great mix & match work wear {I chose a skirt, a pair of trousers & a shift dress all in black, plus a selection of tops in bright colours}, 2 or 3 ‘going out’ tops or dresses & a few basic vests/tees should cover all eventualities.

5. Accessorise! If you’re struggling to find anything you like, get the absolute basics & pretty them up to your heart’s content. Your growing bump won’t have any effect on the fit of fabulous jewellery, scarves, brooches, hats & bags. Phew.

6. Don’t forget your boobs! As soon as they start to feel fuller/heavier, make sure you get properly fitted for a quality, comfortable maternity bra – you’ll be glad you did!

7. Most importantly, love your bump. Embrace it. There’s no point trying to hide or disguise it under big baggy ill-fitting clothes – that’s a sure-fire way to make yourself look ‘fat’, and to feel frumpy & fed up. Choose well fitting, belly skimming pieces, fabric that drapes & flatters your bump, and you’ll look & feel a million times better.

SMILE! Even if you’ve got miserable morning sickness & chronic backache, fake it! Keep telling yourself ‘only a few more months to go’, and focus on the fantastic little person growing inside rather than how you’re looking from the outside. Love your bump & you’ll look like a gorgeous blooming yummy mummy in the making. Because you are

(Our Taryn design: http://www.mummylooksfab.co.uk/Taryn-Nursing-and-Maternity-Dress is perfect – available in classic black or bang on trend for Autumn/Winter orange, plus it doubles as a nursing dress once baby is here, AND it’s reduced to just £45 so you could even treat yourself to one in each colour!)

For work: Team your dress with black tights and ballet pumps, add a couple of chunky bangles in coordinating colours, and you’re good to go with a chic yet professional ensemble.

For daytime casual chic: Whether you’re meeting friends for lunch, or hitting the shops to stock up on baby clothes, your new favourite dress can go with you.  Wear with a pair of leggings or jeggings & your favourite boots – throw on a chunky scarf in one of this seasons key colours – think burnt oranges, mustard yellows, or a classic red, a matching knitted hat, grab your coat and off you go.

For midwife appointments: Fit & flare frocks are perfect for midwife appointments – Stick a pair of black leggings or thick tights underneath & you’ll be able to give her easy access to the bump without losing your dignity or freezing to death!  And don’t forget to complete the look with a big statement bag to stash your all important pregnancy notes in!

For a brisk stroll: I’m sure you know by now that walking is fantastic exercise during pregnancy – so don’t let the cold put you off! Throw on your frock (with a vest top underneath if it’s really chilly), put your favourite maternity jeans underneath, layer up with a chunky sweater or cardigan, plus winter woollies, and off you go.  (Rewarding yourself with a hot chocolate at the end of your brisk stroll is optional, but recommended!)

For evening glamour: Show off your bump in your gorgeous dress, some funky tights, and heels if you can bear them, ballet pumps if not.  Dress the look up with some bling – a stack of chunky bracelets, or a statement necklace.  Slick on some lippy & feel gorgeous.  Because you are!

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